![]() ![]() The only question is: How will they buy it? Water-skiing? Jet-skiing? At the hands of local yokels straight out of “Deliverance”? (One redneck even goes by “Red.”) It’s only a matter of time when composer Graeme Revell’s familiar hydraulic score kicks in. They’re all, of course, prime shark bait. Ellis (“Snakes on a Plane”), “Shark Night” features seven good-looking actors as college students vacationing on Lake Crosby in the Louisiana Delta. ![]() More crude thrills from stuntman-turned-director David R. Could it be that the screenwriters saw this abortion as “Jaws” with a Dostoyevskian slant? Yeah, sure, and “Piranha 3D” was an exercise in Pirandellian absurdity. “There’s no such thing as sick anymore … It’s beyond good and evil! Someone has to raise the bar.”Īnd who says exploitation can’t be educational? I bet you didn’t expect a lecture in moral relativism with your holiday dose of T&A and gore. In one of many hilariously addled scenes, a character defends the idea of hardcore underwater snuff films to a guy who’s about to become dinner. That’s the cynical premise behind “Shark Night 3D,” which the producers are hoping you’ll confuse with the marginally better “Fright Night” and “Piranha 3D.” If 20 million viewers tune in to watch divers cuddle up to sharks without suffering so much as an abrasion during TV’s “Shark Week,” millions more will tune in when guaranteed the real thing, real people being ripped to ribbons in a weekly feeding frenzy.
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